And Now For Something Completely Different …

One of my old and most-favorite shows of all time was Monty Python, which -as we know – featured the humor and impeccably inane personality of John Cleese. Here’s John, sharing his latter-day wisdom which makes light of the nuisance we call “war” …



The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Syria and have therefore raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.” The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s get the Bastards.” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.... of Monty Python Fame, the Fabulous and Prolific John Cleese

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbor” and “Lose.”

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels ..

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from “No worries” to “She’ll be right, Mate.” Two more escalation levels remain: “Crikey! I think we’ll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!” and “The barbie is cancelled.” So far no situation has ever warranted use of the last final escalation level.

John Cleese,
British writer, actor and tall person

And as a final thought – Greece is collapsing, the Iranians are getting aggressive, and Rome is in disarray. Welcome back to 430 BC.

Life is too short…

An Open Letter to Prime Minister Stephen Harper

Office of the Prime Minister
Jan 24, 2013

Dear Mr Harper,

This is a letter to you, and to those who form your caucus.

For the first time in my life, I am embarrassed to be a “Canadian”.

I was born here in this country, almost 60 years ago. I’ve lived and enjoyed a peaceful, plentiful existence, in what has been up ’til now, a democratic nation, peopled and governed by human beings who respected each other,and who also took the time to respect our environment, all the richness and splendor of nature that we’ve been so bountifully blessed with.

Betrayed by Stephen Harper and his Unholy Alliance to Oil and MoneyAnd now, in front of my eyes, I see you and your government – step by step- disassembling democracy, decimating the environment, and above all, acting in secretive, dishonest ways to bulldoze through legislation which will leave our country and its citizens vulnerable to whatever financial and economic powers want to walk in and literally plunder our resources.

I’m sorry, but the tired old line, “jobs and economy” doesn’t cut the mustard any more. It doesn’t work in a planet whose atmosphere is being poisoned by fossil fuel. It’ doesn’t work, because it’s more than Canadians and their pretty little back yards who are at stake here; it’s the whole of civilization and species as we know it. It doesn’t work, because no line you can give us is going to provide an excuse for the sleazy and embarrassing tactics you’ve used to back off Kyoto and other commitments to planetary cooperation with other nations in easing the carbon payload in our already overburdened atmosphere.

And now, you’re wanting to ship this oil – the dirtiest of all oils, to the biggest polluters on the planet, who will further burden our eco-system by refining this “guck”, and even further by burning the end-product and spewing it into the air? You must be joking.

Already, climate change has taken hold of this planet so severely, that science itself is beginning to quake in their boots at the prospect of what is to come. The polar ice caps are melting. Outrageous oil spills have decimated the environment in sensitive Eco-systems that will never be the same again.

And you’re wanting to send this sludge in pipelines, across pristine wilderness, to be placed into tanker ships the size of the Empire State building, which will be plying dangerous waters off the BC Coast to take their horrendous payload to China? “China” – who you’re giving unprecedented sovereignty to, to walk in and plunder our Eco-system and resources?

Who is going to benefit from these disastrous mistakes, these miscalculated tragedies-of-outrageous-proportion just waiting to happen? You and your cronies? Tycoons who have invested in these toxic companies? A few pipe-fitters, welders and machinery operators will have beer and pizza money for a few more years. “Wow”. All this in exchange for decimating our environment, and making us a laughing-stock in the eyes of world citizens who care about this beautiful planet?

I am insulted by the deceit, the arrogance, the irresponsibility and the lack of courage that you and your government are portraying to the Canadian people and to the world at large, in the way you are handling the responsibilities of government.

You are responsible not only to us, in terms of honest and transparent government, but you are also responsible to the people of Canada and the people of this planet Earth in terms of fostering and creating a sustainable future for our generation, and for generations to come.

You are failing in all regards.  What you are doing amounts to Global Environmental Sabotage.

I am ashamed to be a Canadian. For the first time in my life.

Gary B
New Westminster, BC

Maple Leaf of an Embarrassed Canada

here’s Harper’s email if any of you want to add your voice: